Lessons Learned From Choking My Brother
Don’t worry, it’s not nearly as terrible as the title makes it sound.
A few years ago I was able to successfully choke my brother unconscious for the first time. We were in Judo class, so it was a controlled environment, and we were practicing chokes. And as a safety explanation, in Judo class we’re taught the proper way to choke someone out. It doesn’t cause brain damage or any other sort of damage, so there’s nothing dangerous about what we were doing. And it was all completely supervised.
The Successful Choke
So back to the choking. My brother and I were engaged in what is known as “matwork”. (For those who aren’t familiar with Judo, the matwork part is similar to wrestling). I managed to get my brother into a choke position. We’d been taught for years how to choke, and been told for years to straighten our wrists instead of pull, but the human brain is a funny thing sometimes. A person just instinctively wants to pull, which never works in Judo. You’re just essentially fighting against a person’s entire body when you try to pull them into choke.
This time was different though. This time I had a few seconds to think before my brother rolled out of my grip. I could hear my Judo instructor’s previous lessons in my head, reminding me to straighten my wrist. So in opposition to everything my brain instinctively wanted to do (pull), I straightened my wrist instead. The next thing I knew my brother was unconscious in my arms and my Judo teacher was cheering the victory.
I’ll never forget how great that moment felt. Naturally a lot of it was because it was the first time I’d ever choked anyone out, and therefore it was a great accomplishment in Judo. But the other part of it was because I’d also just learned two very important lessons that went well beyond the Judo mat. They were life lessons as much as Judo lessons.
Letting Go
Firstly, choking out my brother taught me that a person doesn’t always have struggle to make something work. Sometimes we just have to let go and allow it to work. Just as my brother was immediately rendered unconscious when I stopped trying to “make” him unconscious by pulling, the same can be said of other life situations.
When we stop trying to make something happen and just let go and allow something to happen, suddenly everything falls into place the way it’s supposed to. Just like choking, it goes against everything our conscious mind believes. Our conscious mind likes to be in control, but when we “let go,” suddenly things work.
Listen To Wisdom
And secondly, choking out my brother taught me that, at least once in a while, a person really should listen to the voice of seasoned wisdom. If I’d actually done what my Judo instructor had told me to for years, let go instead of pull, I’d have succeeded in choking out someone many out years earlier.
As for my unconscious brother, my Judo instructor used it as a great opportunity to teach us how to wake someone up after having been choked out. It’s a technique that leaves the person who was choked out feeling great when they wake up. And that’s exactly how my brother felt when he suddenly popped his head up off the mat, feeling totally refreshed. It must be admitted, however, that he did have an amusing look of surprise on his face when he saw the entire Judo class crowded in a circle around him.
By Amber Reifsteck, The Woodland Elf
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